If you were to ask me what role I enjoy the most this Mother’s Day-roles that include being a wife, a mother, a homeschool teacher and a nurse-I would say by far my favorite is being a mother to the most beautiful gifts the LORD could have given me. A big old sorry to my dear husband, being a wife comes a close second! Ok, ok, I’m kidding, it is a tie! Cue the LOL.

Anyhow, if you were to have asked me the same question in my twenties, you would have received a very different answer. In fact, I would have told you it was my role as a nurse and my prospectives of becoming Nurse Practitioner, NP for short. You see, I was a career woman. Driven, independent, feminist-focused, volunteer guru, and always at the top of my class.

My career was my idol and everything that encompassed it. Kids were not in my plans, not in my future, not in my heart. Nor was the LORD. I believed I was the author of my life. Try hard enough, put in the work, and manifest your output was my philosophy.

In fact, my B.C. (before Christ) plans were projected as follows: 1) Career first (cause duh… safety net! Ain’t no man taking care of me and it’s about my dreams don’t you know!), 2) marriage, and 3) maybe, maybe kids? But, I’d rather work at owning my own practice… I had thought then.

Also, it is important to say this-having an aspiration is not a crime. Being wise and methodical, not a crime. Having a larger-than-life purpose, also not a crime. The issue here with my own life at that time had been my heart. My heart was self-centered, fearful and superficial.

I soon learned that I could plan all I wanted, but the Lord was the one who would set the pavers of the road before me (Proverbs 16:3; Proverbs 3-5). Now, my philosophy in life is the following: Don’t plan but prepare.

“Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”- Proverbs 16:3

THANK YOU GOD FOR THAT!

Isn’t this just like the LORD? To wheel us into our intended course, despite our own pursuits. Jonah anyone (Jonah 1-4)?

Praise God for HIS sovereignty because in marriage I soon found I did in fact want children.

Unfortunately, what proceeded were years of infertility and being told I could never conceive…

But God!

One Father’s day weekend, our pastor approached my husband, mid-service. He grabbed my husband by the shoulder and whispered in his ear, “Happy Father’s Day in faith.” Three days later I found out I was pregnant! Even now this story brings me to tears! What only our God can do! How can I not believe and surrender my life?

Fast forward to today, as I reflect on being a mother, I realize this journey is the most rewarding, challenging, and sanctifying journey I could ever be on.

I know I speak for all the mamas in the world. There is nothing like it. To watch part of your heart walking outside your body is the most beautiful yet dangerous feeling.

What wouldn’t you do for your children.

What wouldn’t you lay down for them.

I laid down my career aspirations. One year short of completing my NP, I chose to walk away for them. I live with no regrets in that area. As I also know this to be true, what the LORD purposes for your life will come to pass-even when you feel your plans unravel or you encounter a fork in the road. Because what the LORD wills, will come to pass (Isaiah 14:27).

“The LORD of hosts has purposed, and who will annul it?”-Isaiah 14:27

Take Joseph as an example (Genesis 37-50).

The LORD had spoken to him in his youth of the purpose and future he would have. In his own immaturity, he didn’t handle this knowledge with wisdom. Creating jealousy, strive and division in declaring the LORD’s plans for him brought on many years of trials and tribulations. I could imagine, Joseph battled with doubts, confusion, exhaustion, and hopelessness. He must have thought he heard wrong from the Lord, among many other questions about where his future would “really” unravel to.

But God.

His plans were merely deterred into lessons that Joseph could not have learned any other way. The purpose had never been removed. The issue with Joseph had been an incorrect heart posture that was unprepared for such purpose. But prepared, it would become.

And through him, the LORD would deliver his people.

So, if you are in a season where you find yourself asking the Lord questions like,

“What gives?”

“Why is this happening?”

“Where are you leading me to?”

“What is my purpose?”

“Why does this feel lonely?”

“Why this and not that?”

Know his plans are greater than what we could ever plan. He meets OUR hearts. He meets you when you surrender it all to him.

Life does not become roses and petals, but life becomes meaningful, weighty, full, and driven. You get to see him in ways you never could.

So be encouraged! If he could do it for people like Joseph and me, oh he can do it for you. Be still and wait on the LORD (Psalm 46:10).

And Happy Mother’s Day!